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It was early morning before the sunrise,
Before the dissipation of the darkness and with it the quiet peace
And reflection that reigned supreme
Over the earth, and as the birds were starting to wake,
Their lazy chirps waiting to greet the dawn,
          I was still watching,

Watching the stars glimmer and hide behind the stark white clouds
Against the backdrop of the night sky
Thinking how extraordinary the world moved through its cycles of birth,
And life, and death,
And how each mechanism
Whether it be physical, spiritual, or emotional

In a continuous figure eight,
Stretching out to infinity and coming back to meet itself once again,
A never ending pattern of extraordinary occurrences,
Seeming random at times, but serving some great purpose
Unknown to the players involved in the journey
–   With only glimpses of synchronicity and serendipity to assure them
That reality existed under the pretense of
          Stability and order,

That the great plan of the universe would unfold
Like the thousand petal lotus that blooms in the summer heat,
Its flushed petals radiating peaceful waves of creation
          As it awakens, –

Thinking that if their prayers were fervent enough,
They would witness the mysteries and miracles of the world
Reflected around them through the rays of the glorious Sun,

And while the morning didn’t wait for me
To finish my contemplations
I had one simple but striking moment,
Suspended in the thralls of time,
Before the busy city streets filled with people who would
Scatter across the pavement,
Some thought, desire, or need propelling them forward into their
          Self-proclaimed futures.

– Anastasiya Maslova



I think it’s amazing how much your home affects your life. The house you choose, the decorations, the people you share it with, the region you finally settle in – these are all factors that help define your happiness. Are you happy with the home you have right now? Sometimes it take a while to find the perfect place, and of course the perfect place changes depending of where you are in your life journey.

I just found my perfect place this weekend. I’ve been interested in the tiny house movement for months now. No, not the one in the picture – that is a house from this company:

If you haven’t heard about the movement yet, YOUTUBE it! The premise is that we put so much emphasis on our material possessions that at some point, we end up accumulating a lot of junk that we don’t need. That sentimental high school graduation robe? Do you really need it? Or that box full of old birthday cards that you’ve been holding on for 30 years? Memories are great, but when they overtake our life in the form of physical things, they become a burden on our present. How can we live fully in the beautiful moment if we are always looking back at those “good old days?”

Anyway, having a tiny house – think townhouse garage size, from 250sq feet to 500sq ft to even 750sq feet (also known as a regular sized apartment in some European cities) – has so many perks!

1. The utilities are minimal – some even choose to invest in a solar panel or two and completely cut our conventional electricity costs. You can make it as sustainable as you want.

2. There is that house taxes loop for “sheds” or at least shed-size living quarters for those who want to own a home.

3. It create an intimate environment and although living in such close quarters with a spouse may be difficult at first, eventually you have to learn to communicate better and that usually strengthens a relationship.

4. My favorite perk is less cleaning!!! If you only have 500sq feet to worry about: well I cleaned my new home in probably 2 hours (I mean deep clean). For regular weekly cleaning it’s like 20 minutes tops.

I can probably go on and on about how great this movement is, but you can just look it up and enjoy watching the beauty of tiny home living on screen. These people are truly innovative, environment-conscious, and most of all happy!

I guess my point is that by the grace of God and my team and all the beings of light who are here helping me, I have finally found my perfect house – the tiny one i have been asking the universe for. She delivered! And if you’re not happy with your home you should go out and look for the one that makes you happy. I encourage you, even dare you, to make such a huge change!

The house doesn’t have to be huge and expensive. Look at the way you think now, get tough with yourself, throw out everything that doesn’t serve a purpose or brings you joy (even if it was super expensive, you could always sell that). The first time will be the hardest, but then you will realize that you all of a sudden have more mobility. You feel more free. Then look at some houses that may be smaller, but cheaper.

Talk to your landlord” you never know, maybe telling him/her that you want to change your life and be happier and for that you need a place that really speaks to you will spark some compassion and understanding and  maybe you can work out a deal, help them find a sublet or let them keep your last month’s rent and deposit to get out a little earlier (worked for me.)

Either way, be happy with where you live – as the outer so the inner, as the inner so the outer. Your inner life may change just by the simple act of moving. It takes some patience, a lot of praying, even more stress, but once you’re in your new place, you might be surprised at how much your life changes.


Ms. Cleverclocks

Just a little piece I thought would be fun to post. It’s an exercise writing a short story all in questions, assuming that there is someone answering them. How would you guys answer these questions?

What is life? Do you think we come from darkness and end in darkness and the life we lead in between is the only light? Don’t you think that beyond this illusion we call reality there is a place that we go back to and call home? What is home? Is it a place or a feeling? Does it depend on the time spent there or the people who wait for you by the window? Does it carry memories from your childhood, or simply hold the things you once loved? Do you think you can recreate your life in a new place? Why not?

Are you afraid of change? Don’t you think that change is what moves us forward? Isn’t it a natural part of this earthly experience? We age every day, don’t we? Is there really such a difference between drastic change and one that is so subtle you don’t notice until years later? You would rather not notice? But isn’t it the point of life to notice the things around you? To enjoy and cherish them? To evolve your perspective and your understanding of the universe around you? We both know that perspective comes from experience right? So are your experiences static? Do you believe that no matter what you do, your life will continue on a straight trajectory? Do you think the years you have in this life are your only ones?

Is there a true end? Or is this just one of the many lives you will have? Will you not find peace and content throughout this journey? What will make you happy? Is it the things you buy? Or the things you give? Or the things you know? Does your knowledge come from abstract ideas or the details in your life? How can you truly ever know if this is all there is? Doesn’t logic deem that life is not the only light, but there is a beyond? Do you wonder? Do you ask the universe? What if she answers?

I’m 4. The 3 of us are sitting on the floor watching The Lion King. I’m wrapped in my sister’s arms on the gray carpet while our older brother is sprawled on the worn leather couch.

“This is boring. Why do I have to sit here and watch this? Do you guys think I didn’t see it a thousand times when I was little?” my brother asks. He’s 15.

“Just watch it with us. It’s family time. Don’t you want to spend some time with your baby brother and me?” Meg chides.

“Lion King!” I say and smile up at him.

I’m 5. My sister catches me as I run into her arms and spins me around. I can hear the wind rushing through my ears and her ringing laugh. It sounds like chimes and bells and happiness. She’s laughing so hard she can barely hold on to me. Slowing down, she mock-falls on the floor taking her with me. We lie there laughing together.

“I love you so much sweetie.” She says.

“Love you too Meg.” I say back.


I’m 6. Meg is 15. We go for a walk in the woods. The sun’s rays are shining through the forest ceiling. It’s the middle of summer, but the full green leaves make it chilly in the shade. She’s pointing to the trees, explaining to me how they grow from tiny little seeds and rise up to the sky.

“They’re trying to get closer to God.” she says. “Like all of us. When they die, when they’re cut down, you can see how long they’ve been trying by the number of rings.” I’m holding on to her index finger with my small hand. It’s peaceful in the woods, but I have the urge to break that peace. I let go of her and run forward.

“Where are you running off to?” she laughs and runs after me. I run faster and look back to see if she’s behind me. I don’t see the root in front of me and trip over it, falling on my knees and hands. It stings so much that I start crying.

“Oh, baby, are you ok?” Meg is by my side, picking me up and sitting me down in her lap. “Let me see that.” She looks at my knees, then at my palms.  I’m still crying. It hurts so much, I try to tell her, but all that comes out is sobbing mumbles.

“Shhh. It’s ok. I’ll carry you home and we can get that cleaned up ok?” she smiles at me. I fall asleep in her arms on the way home.


I’m 7. I’m dressed in a suit. It’s uncomfortable and my dad tells me I have to keep my shoes clean. I look for Meg. I can’t find her anywhere. She hasn’t been home for days.

“Where is Meg?” I keep asking. My Mom’s eyes are tear-stained. Meg should be here to make Mom feel better. I never see Mom cry and Meg would know what to do. She always makes me smile. She can make Mom smile too. My brother is leaning on a tree, away from all the people so I go over to him.

“Where is Meg?” I ask. He seems angry. I pull on the corner of his suite jacket. “Where is Meg?” I ask again.

“She’s not fucking here!” He yells at me. “She’s gone. She’s not coming back! She’s dead.” He scares me and I run to my Dad crying. He picks me up and hands me over to Mom. I see him walk over to my brother and start yelling at him. Dead? What is dead? Where is Meg?

Dead means never coming back. Mom and Dad are sitting in front of me in the living room. It’s dark out now.  Mom is trying to tell me something. Something about Meg. She was somewhere, with friends. There was a car. It was night time, just like now. I don’t understand.

“God takes the best.” Dad says. “You will see Meg again. She’s with him, up there in the sky: in Heaven.”

“She’s coming back?” I ask. I know what hope is, I’m 7. I can feel it. He said I’ll see her again.

“No, darling, no.” Mom tries. “She’s…” she starts crying again. She touches my Dad on the arm, stands up and walks out of the room. She hasn’t stopped crying for forever.

“Son,” Dad sighs. “Meg… she’s not coming back. She’s watching you from above. That’s what death is. You go back to God and you leave your family behind and you wait for them.”

“Why would she leave?” I ask. Now I feel panic. Meg would never leave me. She says she loves me.

“Honey, I don’t know how to explain this to you…” He seems to be giving up. I can feel it. I need to understand. Why would she leave?

“She didn’t want to leave us.” He tries again.  “She didn’t want to leave you. She loves you and always will…. God called her back to him. It will eventually happen to all of us. Mom and I will go back. So will your brother, and you will too, when you’re very old. Like grandpa’s age. You have a whole life to live before that. Ok?”

I sit there for a couple of minutes.

Meg is gone. I can’t see her until I’m like grandpa. That’s forever!  She’s not coming back, Dad says. She’s dead. Dead means gone. Gone?

I miss her.

“I miss Meg.” I tell Dad. I start crying.

“I know son. So do I. So does Mom and your brother. We all miss her so much.” He takes me into his arms and I cry there until I can’t cry anymore.


This is a story I’ve been working on for a while. Hope you enjoyed! Any feedback and constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.

So, everyone in the “spiritual community” has been talking about this symbolic alignment within numerology. November 11, 2011 (this FRIDAY) is truly an energetic gateway that is the strongest call for humanity to awaken to their divinity to date.

I want to inform people of this energetic portal, to lead you to your own opinion, to see if you resonate with this information, to see if you feel the change that is slowly building and will open in just 4 more days!

Of course, this portal won’t be the end or the beginning of this mass awakening. It is just another stepping stone, an influx of light hitting our planet to help us ascend, to help us see and feel the oneness we have with all creation. To help us get even closer to our divine selves, our true selves: the light beings that we are.

I hope all of you who read this will take the time to prepare for this day, to at least be aware of the energies, even if it is just sitting still for 11 minutes when the clock strikes 11:00AM on Friday.

Trust in yourself, trust in your feelings, trust in what your inner self tells you. You are divine light, you are the savior of our planet. You are the reflection of the Creator in every way, and you will turn our world into Heaven.

Check out these readings, as they have helped me to better understand what this day is all about:





Today I am thinking about kindness. How do we as the human race view it? Is it letting someone cut the line in front of you when they’re late for work? Or donating money to a popular and positively influential Christian radio station? Is it picking up $40 of off someone’s porch and simply sliding the money into their mail slot? Or giving up your seat to an old woman on the bus?

My father has always said, kindness is never (or rarely) returned with kindness while evil is always returned three-fold. (I don’t mean karma) So it’s logical to avoid evil deeds in fear that it will come back to haunt you.  But then is there any incentive for us to be kind if we get nothing in return?

Isn’t the amazing thing about pure kindness is that it is unconditional? To show kindness just for the sake of doing it can be liberating… even magical. It should make us feel good, and for most of us it does – but that is a condition in itself. So is unconditional kindness then reserved for God only, who does everything unconditionally? Or can people truly and fully embrace love and give it back to the world…. just because?

I know we can!

I first heard the following song on KLove Radio. It’s so uplifting and lighthearted and funny, but also carries a deep message. Life should be kind and lighthearted and we have to remember not to focus on the little things that upset us in daily life. I try to remember this song every time I’m stuck in traffic or someone cuts me off. (Instead of honking or shaking my fist at the other person.) I take a deep breath and remember that I must be learning something from this if God has sent it my way. We are all beings of light – souls – and we can choose to live in kindness and love for others.

The song reminds me that there are things much bigger than me. We all have a purpose and remembering the big picture when the annoying details get in the way is extremely important.

I believe this awareness starts with kindness.



I though this would be the appropriate time to post my favorite What is…? It was difficult to articulate exactly how I understand God to be, and some of the most simple phrases I used actually came from my Father. He has a true gift of storytelling and teaching and can make the most complicated idea become the easiest thing to understand. This isn’t to say that this is exactly what he thinks, or that everything in this post came from him, but he did help me put some of my beliefs into words.

What is God?

Our faith in God is constantly tested throughout each lifetime. This doubt is a product of free will – the ability to think for ourselves and explore all the possibilities of the universe. I was only tested once in my short twenty-two years. This test came in the form of a written idea from a man named Robert Monroe. His first book Journeys Out of the Body is about his personal out-of-body experiences, written in a scientifically inclined way (although there is little science that connects to this phenomenon.) Monroe found a way to approach it by using the scientific method, conducting surveys, and even testing physical responses in a lab. His skepticism, awe, and uncertainty really made this mystical phenomenon seem logical and above all, believable. His second book Far Journeys, which was written fifty years after he discovered his new ‘talent’, has a very different approach.

No longer a skeptic, Monroe’s experiences border science fiction and even I had trouble discerning whether his experiences were true or made up. Yet with the solid foundation he built in his first book I had to believe he wasn’t crazy, which is where my test of faith came in. The basic event that he documents in his book was the interaction with a being that was outside of our planet, an “alien” who happened to have visited Earth on a certain “field trip,” and that outsider perspective brought the knowledge that life on Earth was created by some super being who needed to somehow come up with a way to cultivate more love to sustain the universe. It degraded the human existence to an experiment in which some greater puppeteer created people to be unsuspecting ants, naïve of our true purpose and how little we really meant on our insignificant planet. It was such a simple and ordinary way to describe our existence that it made me question whether our God, my God, was actually a “god” at all.

From the human, “internal” perspective we have of course retained the ethnocentric view that we are these special being that God took billions of years to create. In Christianity, we view His relationship with Adam and Even as that of a father and his children. We believe that God is this supreme, pure being that took great care to place us in a paradise on Earth, although our two main ancestors destroyed that pretty quickly. Yet all those religious texts still talk about God speaking to ordinary humans, commanding them to obey his wishes, easing their pain and suffering, teaching them about love. So is God really just some humanoid that can be measured and seen by other energy forms in the spirit world beyond our solar system?

I struggled with this new concept for months before I realized how this personified “God” fit into the universe. We are born to understand certain hierarchies to help us put things and beings in place. The head of the table, the chief executive in a company, the president of a country, the Pope in the Catholic Church are all within our grasp of understanding who is in charge of what. This “God” that wasn’t a God, but a sort of scientist who needed a place to create a substance (love) was in fact portrayed as the guy above us who was “in charge.”

The realization that has been brought to my attention, albeit Monroe’s encounter with this information was real and true or not, is that despite my every attempt to not bring God down to our human level, I still could not fully grasp what or who he is. It is possible that we weren’t directly created by the omniscient, omnipotent, and omnipresent God who is the true Source and Creator, but the main point is that God, the True God, is all those things.

God is outside of the reasonable and logical creationism that is often assigned to Him. People need to measure things to fully understand them yet God’s purpose is not to be understood. He is outside of the realms of our universe, mainly because he is the one who created it. Just like there may be some “scientist” or spiritual entity or Angel that created human beings, there is someone who created that Angel and then someone or something that created that creator. The logical inference then is that there is some all-powerful being that has created everything. God is the ultimate Creator – the Source of all that is, but he is not confined to that hierarchical system that we seem to assign everything to. He is outside and within everything. He simply is. He did not come from anything or anywhere yet He stretches across everywhere, every-when, and everything. He is not actually a “he” or “she” or “it.” We use those terms due to language constraints only.

It is impossible to explain God. He is immaterial while we are material. It is impossible for the material to understand the immaterial. He is the ultimate Creator, outside the framework and structure of existence and although we feel His presence and see His traits throughout our system, we cannot explain Him. It is important to note that being outside the “system,” God is also outside of space and time. The constraints that are put upon human kind and even the rest of the universes do not apply to God. Time is only a characteristic of matter – it is the speed of one piece of matter relative to another and without time there is no Space, because there is no measurable distinction between one place and another. So if God is outside of this sphere of reality, how do we know He exists or what He is?

God created us in his likeness meaning that along with free will he gave us the power to create. This creativity is a trait that we can attribute to God that helps us grasp a small inference about who and what He is. Yet just as we create a painting, the characters that we paint on the canvas cannot understand us (presuming they have thoughts.) We are not within the painting yet we are its creators. The interesting part about this painting though, is that our essence, characteristics, and traits can still be shown: our use of color, brush strokes, placement of details all reflect who we are – our identity. God is reflected in our life through his traits and characteristics too. He shows himself in love, forgiveness, empathy. He shows himself through our jealousies and our conscience. We can see hints of him only through reflections like glimpses of light in a house of mirrors.

Our souls are the material counterparts that help us to communicate with Him. The soul is not physical, but it is still matter. We cannot touch the codes within a computer system, but we know they’re there whizzing through cyberspace. Like a computer code our soul is a piece of our solar system’s information field. The Akashi Records are considered to be the spiritual library where every soul’s actions, words, thoughts, feelings, ideas, etc. are stored (before, during, and after what we might consider the human experience or maybe even the periods before birth and death.) Our soul obviously carries our identity within itself and is our connection to the Holy Spirit and to the Almighty God. God is all-knowing and all-powerful and infinite and because of those traits he can and does communicate with us on a personal level. Each of us have our own personal “God” who is personified to suite our needs. In those ways he is our true Father and to some, the religious figure that they rely on.

Another example of this personification is Jesus Christ. How can the immaterial ever truly connect with the material as to be understood and grasped, like a flat, two-dimensional square can understand a three-dimensional sphere without leaving its two-dimensional world? God took the human likeness of Christ so that he could show people how to live in his likeness. Although free will is something that lets us have our own opinions (even towards or against our own Father), it is still within His world that we have this. It brings up a question of whether free will is truly free, if it was always within God’s plan for us to have it. Yet in his likeness in Christ he gave us a chance to understand more of his traits and characteristics. Christ, like any human being could not explain God or show us the true nature of God, but he did show that reflection of how we can better live in our Creator’s likeness. It does not mean that our “bad” choices are actually bad and that Adam and Eve’s original sin was evil or wrong, but the path of love that Jesus showed humanity is one worth pursuing.

In the end, God is love and love is God. Monroe’s encounter with information that came from outside of our solar system may have undermined the magnificent story of planet Earth and we really are just producers of “love” like bees producing honey. But to bees, isn’t honey the most amazing thing? And it’s hard to argue that for humanity, love is anything but the most amazing thing. The way love makes us feel, how it binds us together and brings joy to all those around us is truly a magical phenomenon. Its existence and lack of existence within our lives drives and motivates us towards our actions. When we are in love, it makes us want to do more great things, to give back, to forgive more easily. When we’re missing love it makes us sad, angry, jealous, and it can lead us to things that are inhumane and evil. All we need to take away from our meager recognition of God is that love is the most powerful and intense state of mind that humanity can experience. Despite our belief or non-belief in God we all know that love does exist because every person feels it in some way or form. Love is the part of God that is fully embedded within our system, while everything else about Him is outside of it.

And it’s relative because… well, we humans created it. We took a perfectly well structured universe that has continued on for billions of years using its own special order for certain events and decided that we’d rather deal with the tedious minute to minute things instead of the big picture of life. Then we became obsessed with our version of time.

We deem people inadequate if they show up to a job interview at 2:01 instead of 1:55. Judge those who wake up at noon and go to bed at 3:00am. Impose weekly and monthly deadlines on artists and writers whose muses sit in shock while their pupils throw away their dreams for short-lived pop-culture sensations. Students rush to finish their Bachelor’s degrees in 3, sometimes even 2 years, cramming for exams and choosing a 4.0 GPA over sleep.

What is 2 years in the sense of the world? Our small planet revolves twice around a lone star in one of the infinite amount of galaxies across the universe. Yet we focus all our attention on the 24 hours we’ve allocated to each day. When did 21 become synonymous with “old” and “midlife crisis” became mandatory to get through your 40’s? When did our desire to meet deadlines trump our desire to relax and enjoy life?

With the knowledge and technology we have today living to 100 isn’t just a possibility, it’s pretty much a guarantee. Of course there are things we choose to do to shorten our life – smoke, drink, tan – but for every one of them we have cures – diets, rehab programs, doctors… Still, I find many people dreaming about how they’ll die in their 50’s after the kids are off to college and they’ve collected their early retirement money. Where are we all rushing too?

This is the way I’ve always seen it, yet still sometimes forget as the whirlwind of our society engulfs me: We are given this one life to live in our physical body. (Whether you believe in reincarnation or not, no life is the same either way) We are all born to look different, given different parents, homes, cultures… different minds. No human being is the same as another. No one thinks the same or acts the same. We’re all on this path to grow our souls and understand a little bit more about God and the wonderful world he has created. It’s long and somewhat difficult, but we have enough time to make our mistakes, to learn from them, and to move beyond the mundane material things; beyond the time restraints that we have created for ourselves.

So this is where Day 4 of my self-induced rehab has brought me. At 21, being able to out-drink most girls and even some guy-friends twice my size every night of the week doesn’t make me an alcoholic. Trying most mainstream drugs at least twice, or eight times – weed, coke, boomers, X, acid, even K – doesn’t make me a drug addict. Surviving a whole semester of school on adderral with a B average and no sleep hasn’t made me crazy. (At least not more crazy than I already was.)

Yet since I’ve had my mini-nervous breakdown, dropped out of classes for the rest of summer (with every intention to come back for the fall semester), and decided to sober up cold-turkey, the world has once again become an open book. It’s slowed down drastically. My dreams are more vivid than they’ve ever been and you know dreams tell a lot about life. They show you what you truly want, help you make important decisions, alleviate your fears and sometimes create new ones. And the philosophical, spiritual, big picture outlook on life has come back while disgusting cigarette smoking habits fell away. The future looks bright with the light of wisdom and joy, and really that’s what all of us are looking for when we get lost in the labyrinth of illusions which our cultural poisons leads us into.

There’s this wonderful person that I recently got to know on a very intimate and spiritual level. He told me that I was the most intriguing person he’s ever met. He thinks I’m insightful and open minded and weird. He told me I speak of things that others are afraid to even think about. That I see the world the way he does and that I realize how much more there is to life while the masses run from job to job, bar to bar, watching God’s wonders pass them by.

I’m always told I that I can’t take a compliment, and true to my nature I’m incapable of accepting this one. I know what I am and I know what I’m not and I know that there are dozens of people like me out there: those who think about the same things I do. Some know more, some know less. The longer I am on this path, the more of them I meet, my friend not being my first or last.

So here comes the part I’ve been dreading all day. They say that to write a blog, you should choose what you’re most passionate about; the topic you understand the best. Some say that the best way to start a blog is to pick a project and record its progress daily while strangers read about your struggles and successes. I can’t really pin point what my material passion is and definitely can’t think of anything I’m exceptionally good at. I love reading, writing, discovering. I love philosophy and spirituality. Sometimes I love watching the news and sometimes I hate it. I don’t know much about car engines or tech gadgets or celebrity gossip or cooking recipes. I major in business, but that doesn’t make me an expert.

I love talking about what I’ve learned though, and love giving people advice. I love showing my friends or even just random strangers life from a different, sometimes bizarre, perspective. I love hearing other people’s views. See where they’ve been in life and where they are now. I like to help people. Sometimes I lead people to fix their life. Sometimes I fail and they walk away barely remembering my name. This new friend of mine has finally pushed me to stop and think – why can’t my obscure opinions and outlooks be used by others. Maybe I can inspire someone I’ve never met. Maybe someone out here in the world wide web will find my crazy disorganized train of thought useful. He has.

– Ms. CleverClocks

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Hi, I’m Anastasiya


I'm so glad that you've stumbled upon (pun intended) my little blog-slice of heaven. I hope you stay a while and discover the ideas and beliefs I hold close to my heart. (we might have the same ones!)

Hopefully, I can pass on some of the wisdom I've gained over the years, and maybe even learn something from you (if you're willing to share.)

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In Love and Light

July 2018
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